BY SYLVIE AMOAH
One of my main passions are travelling. It's something I have always wanted to do. As a teenager, I would day dream about the places I would visit and still do. I did a bit of travelling visiting some Greek Islands, Egypt and Ghana with friends and family, but never on my own. In my early twenties, I toyed with the idea of becoming a travel photographer or having a career that involved travelling abroad. I had a real sense of fearless adventure back then. I felt free and had the belief that the sky was my limit. I couldn't wait for the time when I would be in a position of financial independence, to just go out there and travel to more countries.
Unfortunately, that took a long time to happen. Along the way, my confidence and courage to travel alone dwindled, as life and my circumstances became challenging and more restricting. I had financial obligations, responsibilities as a single parent and personal challenges within myself to overcome and heal. The biggest barrier to my dream to travel solo wasn't from anything outside of my self, it came from my own self-imposed limitations, my fears and lack of self-belief.
It is very easy to talk ourselves out of following our hearts desires. When we give in to negative self-talk and self-limiting beliefs- like mice- they literally nibble away and erode our confidence and courage leading to self-depreciation. We give up on our much-cherished dreams, watching from the safety of our 'comfort zone'. We tell ourselves that we don't have the time, resources, it's too late or we subconsciously wait for someone to give us permission or validation that we can go because it is natural to feel nervous when you are stepping into uncharted territory. If you acknowledge and recognise these emotions for what they are but stay determined to keep moving forward anyway, you'll find it gets easier each time and your confidence grows.
Well, they say life begins at 40. Nothing immediately changed in my life when I turned forty, but I have to say, as I now approach 46 I can see how much I've released myself from my self-imposed limitations. Life begins at any age. The adventure begins when we recognise what we are allowing to hinder our growth. When we examine and ask ourselves what beliefs we are holding on to that are no longer serving us? Or what ways we are consciously or unconsciously sabotaging our dreams? Living authentically takes courage and the willingness to dare to do, to be spontaneous and to lovingly allow ourselves to accept the very best in life.
In 2015, an encounter with an important soul mate who exited my life, triggered me to shift my perspective and to live life more fully and joyfully. I set the intention that I was now going to dare to be bold in spite of my fears and just go for it. I booked a seat on Eurostar and went to France by myself for five days to celebrate my 44th birthday. Since then, I have travelled to other countries on my own. I still have a mini moment of 'what am I doing', but each time I venture off I come back with increased self-respect and inner confidence and it just encourages me to push myself beyond what my fears tell me I can't do. On my last trip to Spain, I met a woman in her early 50s and an 18-year-old, whilst visiting the Nerja Caves in Malaga. We were all travelling solo and spent our afternoon together. We were united for a brief time in our mutual passion for travel, nature, sisterhood and willingness to go it alone.